I've Advised My Client, Mr. Charles Fuqua Manuel Jr., to Plead Insanity

When 68 year olds start to make silly decisions, we point to their age. Dementia or Alzheimer's is starting to kick in. When they do it night in and night out, we send them to a retirement home. If Charlie Manuel stepped out of the dugout without any pants on, it would be both hilarious and harmless.  But when he calls for bunts by the dozens, marches out 25 different lineups in 25 different games, and misuses his bullpen it might be time for him to pack his bags too.

Even I, one of the most steadfast Cholly supporters, am running out of excuses. In fact, if I were his defense attorney in the case of The People of The Delaware Valley v. Charlie Manuel, I'd just simply point to the bench/bullpen and say "What do you want me to do with that?" and rest my case.

It's not all his fault... Roy Halladay labors during the 5th inning of tonight's game, but who do you bring in? Joe Savery who was a minor league hitter this time last year? Brian Sanchez who's on his 2nd or 3rd stint with the team without ever hanging on? Jose Contreras whose Cuban to American age exchange rate likely means he's 57 instead of 40? Schwimmer, Bastardo, Qualls? Or should he just bring in Papelbon in the 5th and hope he can go 4+ strong? A one lung-ed, blindfolded Halladay is still likely going to perform better than just about every other option out of the bullpen and in a game where you have a solid lead and can afford to give up a few runs, you let your ace (107-0 when given a 4 run lead) try to work his way out of a jamb... it just didn't work so well tonight.

That said, there is plenty to be critical of:

• Bunting for Base-hits: Small ball is a necessity right now, but averaging almost two bunt for a base hit attempts per game takes any element of surprise out of the play. Bunt hits have only been successful 6 times all season.
• Constantly slotting your best hitter in the 7 hole: Chooch leads the team in every offensive statistic other than SBs, yet has the fewer plate appearances than Freddy Galvis and only 4 more than Ty Wigginton. Meanwhile the SS position has been the least productive on the field offensively for the Phillies and has only batted in the top 3 lineup spots. Fewer RBI than anyone other than the pitcher and zero HRs on the season from the SS.
• Signing  Using Jim Thome... ever: His homecoming was a heartwarming story, but to put things into perspective: The last time Jim Thome had an extra base hit in a Phillies uniform, Cory Lidle was the losing pitcher (and was still alive). 
• Lineup Juggling: This isn't the circus, it's baseball! March the same two teams out there two days in a row, will you! I'm tired of this pull names out of a hat while in the locker room to see who is going to play where and bat when.
• Saving your closer for a lead: Traditional baseball wisdom suggests... blah blah blah. When your 6-7-8 guys can't hold a lead, dig into the Tony LaRusa bag of tricks (not the lineup juggling bag, the other one!) and have your closer make 5 or 6 outs. 1) He's making $50M 2) If he's unavailable, he shouldn't be warming up in the pen multiple times and 3) Chances are he's going to sit on the bench later in the season and watch more complete game efforts from his starters than any other closer in baseball. You cannot in one breath say that Cliff Lee pitching ten innings is no big deal (and I don't think it is) because his pitch count was still low, and then in another say that you refuse to use Jonathan Papelbon for more than one inning this early in the season. Which is your pitcher freshness criteria, innings or pitches? It can't be both.

I'm tired, it's late... feel free to contribute to the list yourselves!